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This is not going to be your cozy, little chat about death. If you’re one of those ‘positive’ thinkers who can’t tolerate any negativity, perceived or real- you should exit this now. If you can’t tolerate profanity, bye. Some things are just shit. Dead puppies suck. Babies with cancer suck. If you can’t call things shit, then I am worried about your sanity. If you kick people out of your cancer group cause they had a bad day and couldn’t maintain the façade of happiness and the narrative “i am going to beat this,” well- fuck you, too.
I am literally in the middle of this. I am neither negative or positive. I can touch both sides of the continuum. I am not even getting the worst of it. My best friend has been diagnosed with glioblastoma multiforme. He is 53 years old this coming Wed. (Nov. 4th, 2020.) In less than a month, he went from walking and talking, to unable to speak due to aphasia and paralyzed on the right side of his body. He has never been sick a day in his life. He is one the kindest, most generous humans I have ever met. Fuck, he tolerated my ass for years- I have known him since 1992. The first day I met him, I had just moved to DFW area; I met him on my first day at work at DFW airport- and it was like Déjà vu- I knew him, and I talked to him, and that was it. His family is a bit odd, but no where near the dysfunction that I experienced, or his wife experienced, within our own families.
In many ways, I ‘think’ like his wife. Why him? There are some real assholes out there in the world- people who don’t want to live, who do drugs, sniff…
