Time Out,

We’re All Being Played

In a world of players, is the only way out to tap out?

I am approaching this first from a generalized, therapeutic sort of framework, though I suspect it may be applicable across multiple life domains. It is quite common for all of us to sometimes play with others, circumstances, institutions, or what have you, instead of recognizing we are where we are because of our own thoughts, actions, and non-actions. Even when we blame ourselves, it is often a self-righteous, self-pitying maneuver, almost passive aggressive, “I get in my own way.” Even if it’s accurate, that statement isn’t nuanced enough to explain why and corrective action. How does a person move in a game of playing and being played even as we play ourselves?

That’s not to say there are factors to blame in life. Some folks will ignore their personal history and how it affects them in the present by saying, “I don’t want to blame my family.” Explanation is not blaming. X happened, the resulting consequences happened. It is what it is, right?

Most of our lives, in this present day and age, America or not but especially in America, knowingly or not, we live in an exchange theory of interaction. From this perspective, all agents are necessarily cogs in the wheel. In this system you pull your weight or experience…